Category archives for: Editorials

WHERE THERE’S SMOKE

Lynn Ashby

THE TOBACCONIST – This is where I pick up my imported cigars, especially rolled for me by a little man east of the Urals. Well, not exactly. My boutique cigar store is Samuel’s Exclusive Club for Discriminating Clientele (some of you shorten it to Sam’s) and my expert connoisseur is Billy Joe, who prefers “a […]

THE FUTURE LIES AHEAD

Lynn Ashby

THE GROCERY STORE – Every year about this time these trashy magazines we see in racks by the checkout counter stop running headlines such as “Did Rob’s Baby Have Horns?” or “Jana and Lance – Kidnapped By Martians?” I have no idea who Rob, Jana and Lance are, and really don’t care. But these lurid […]

OUR YEAR OF TEARS

Houston, we don’t have a problem. Well, some problems. True, 2014 was when we saw big changes in sports, plus a quick about face in City Hall and Finger Furniture went out of business – again. So let’s look at these past 12 months. For Rice’s Honorarium: Rice President David Leebron received $1.5 million in […]

THE YEAR OF THE RAT

Lynn Ashby

What a year it was! Military victories, parades, the troops came home, there was peace on earth and prosperity in the land. The year I am speaking of is 1945, of course, because 2014 was a real downer. Here in Texas, we elected or re-elected some strong arguments for Santa Anna’s return. The happy folks […]

OUT IN THE COLD

Lynn Ashby

THE KITCHEN – Here it is, strong and white, a huge testimony to modern technology and lots of cold cash, so to speak. My new refrigerator. You probably have such an appliance in your home, most people do. Perhaps also one in your office and car, maybe on board your 110-foot-long yacht, in your plane […]

A NOTION OF IMMIGRANTS

Lynn Ashby

One night I was having dinner in an eatery when the owner came over and said, “Mee-stur HASH-bee, you have a phone call.” Huh? The café was in an unknown village in the Netherlands, and few if any people knew I was there, or cared. The call was from an American friend, Phil, who worked […]

AWAY ALL QUOTES!

Lynn Ashby

“I’m from Texas and one of the reasons I like Texas is because there’s no one in control.” — Willie Nelson. “Doesn’t Texas sometimes seem to resemble a country like Saudi Arabia, with its great heat, its oil wealth, its brimming houses of worship, and its weekly executions?” — Martin Amis, “The Palace of the […]

BITE THE BALLOT

Lynn Ashby

THE PARTY – “So what do you think about the elections?” I ask a total stranger, trying to make idle chatter. “I’ll TELL YOU WHAT I THINK!” he says sweetly, pouring his drink on my canapés. Uh-oh. I’ve done it again. Today the mere mention of politics and/or elections sets off a firestorm. No one […]

AS BIG AS TEXAS

Lynn Ashby

THE OPEN ROAD – As good highway drivers, we keep a sharp eye out for slick roads, dangerous curves and, of course, cops. But now we must also watch out for yet another danger: wildlife which dart across the road in front of us in their suicidal attempt to run up our car insurance premiums. […]

An ID-eal Situation

Lynn Ashby

You have already voted, the ballots either have been counted or are being re-counted, depending whether the LBJ School of Ballot Management is in charge. And you are celebrating another victory for democracy. As the Church Lady would say, “Well. aren’t you special.” That’s because you have all the necessary paraphernalia, appear prosperous and Anglo, […]

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